Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure

Today was the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in which my family and friends walked or ran to raise money to find a cure for breast cancer. It was a great morning!

My girls, Jennifer, Esther, Megan, and Sharon (and I) before the walk. Missing is Melinda who went to grab something to eat.

My family who showed up to support me: brother-in-law Sal, (me), neice Rosanna, Beni, cousin Enza, and neice Anna at the bottom with the boys. Missing is my nephew, Michael, who was lining up for the 5K run.

Frankie sporting his free New Balance stickers.

Beni and the boys doing the 5K.

Our numbers for the 5K Walk

My awesome family and I about to cross the finish line.

The girls and I at the finish line. I walked the whole 5K! Now that's what I call kickin' cancer's butt!

Below are the names of those I walked for, some who didn't win their battles, and more who did!

My role models:

Chemo Sucks

This week was an icky week. In the past, I had pretty much learned that chemo day - Thursday, was relatively side-effect free with the exception of hot flashes and a mild headache. Friday was similar, but nothing major. Saturday brought on the achiness and lethargy and Sunday followed and Monday and possibly Tuesday brought on flu-like headache, achiness and general exhaustion.

A week ago on Friday, I came home and wrote up my lesson plans for Monday and Tuesday. I figured if I needed to miss those days, I would have the plans ready to go and wouldn't have to get up early to write them. It was an easy week, anyway. I was showing a movie in 3 out of 5 classes.

Around this time I began to lose my tastebuds. Eating bland foods like Wheat Thins tastes like eating a thin, cripsy piece of cardboard. A pickle still tastes like a pickle, but unless it's something really spicy or flavorful, it all tastes kind of blah. My mouth has been getting dryer and dryer. I feel, at times, like something is pinching the back of my throat. I need to have something to drink near me at all times. Carbonated drinks seem to taste best, though I don't know why. When I wake up I feel like someone has shoved cotton in my mouth ala Marlon Brando in The Godfather.

On Saturday, I had a cold - congestion, runny nose. I took Dayquil and stayed home from my neice's Sweet Sixteen surprise party that night. I felt pretty miserable.

On Sunday, I just lounged around, reading and resting. Beni busted his butt cooking two meals for the week. Maybe three. Having rested all day, I felt a lot better by Sunday night, so I thought I'd see how I felt in the morning before deciding to call in sick on Monday.

Monday morning, I felt okay. I knew I'd have an easy day of movie-watching and reading with my other classes, so I sucked it up and went to work. I was tired all day and had a little nausea head ache all day, but it was okay. I came home and napped and warmed up the Italian wedding soup for dinner that Beni had made the day before. We ate dinner and on my second bowl of soup, the nausea suddenly kicked in again and BAM! Run to bathroom. No more soup in my belly.

After that I decided I had over-done for a Monday. I took the day off Tuesday. I ate toast and drank tea and slept a lot. I ate chicken soup for dinner. My fear of looking at the boys' dinner made me ruin that, as well. It was pasta with fava beans that my in-laws had prepared and frozen the sauce for and I had to literally almost close my eyes as I transferred the sauce to the pan to warm in up, for fear of losing my toast. According to the boys, dinner didn't taste so good.

I do have pills for nausea, but they make me sleepy, so I don't like to take them at work or when I have to drive.

Wednesday I went back to work. It was another easy day of standardized testing all day long. Lots of sitting for me. I still felt a little iffy about food, so ate toast for breakfast and chicken soup for lunch. Was a little nervous about the smells of other people's lunches in the lunch room, but everything turned out okay.

As the week continued, the nausea dissipated. By Friday, I felt relatively normal, but the sad part is that it used to be Tuesday or Wednesday when I felt normal. My normal days are becoming fewer and farther between. I have only one more A and C chemo treatment and I dread it. The idea of that lousy, sinus feeling I get from one of the treatments makes me feel nauseated all over again. I try not to think about it.

After that treatment I start weekly visits for Taxol and Herceptin. Herceptin is side-effect free. My mom was in the clinical trial 10 years ago and raves about how great it is. Taxol is still a chemo treatment with side effects, but the nurses tell me the side effects aren't as bad. What worries me is that my treatments will be weekly and that even if there are only one or two bad days afterwards, that gives me only three "normal" days to recooperate.

I think that chemo, thought it does take a physical toll on your body, is more of a mental exhaustion. It's the thought of always looking ahead at what's to come, knowing you are going to feel icky for 12 more weeks or 18 or whatever the doctors have told you you will have to endure.

I am so glad that I have work to distract me. I can't imagine what I would do sitting at home having these thoughts constantly. My students this semester are beyond awesome! They are the sweetest, most caring and most motivated I have had in ages! I love being with them on my good days and even on my bad ones, they make me feel loved and always ask how I'm feeling.

Tomorrow is the 5K Susan G. Komen Walk. I will post some pictures of my awesome team of friends and family that are walking with me and thanks to everyone who donated funds to find a cure!

I am blessed.

Just an Update

Thanks so much to those of you who have generously donated to the Susan G. Komen Walk that I will be participating in on Sunday, Sept. 25th. My team's goal of $1,000. has been met, but my personal goal of $500. still has $130. to go. If you are interested in donating, go to the link in my last blog to do so.

Overall, I have been feeling well. I had my most recent chemo this past Thursday, with a Neulasta shot on Friday. Today is Saturday and, as usual, I woke up a little achy and took some Tylenol. Seems to be the same scenario each time. I have lesson plans and things ready at school just in case I have to take off Monday and Tuesday for flu-like symptoms that seem to arrive on days 4 and 5. Luckily, this weekend I don't have a lot of grading to do, so relaxing on my couch, watching Love and Other Drugs (which has been sitting next to the t.v. for over a month now) and Limitless, reading more of Catching Fire and Hanging with Lab Coats seems to be the order of the weekend.

Last Monday, I attended "Look Good . . . Feel Better" a class sponsored by the American Cancer Society that teaches women going through cancer how to best apply make-up while going through treatments, how to draw on eyebrows when they fall out, etc. It was fun and I got a bunch of free make-up from companies like Mary Kay, Avon, Neutragena, MAC and even Chanel! Very cool! In just talking with the other women who attended, almost all of whom were older than me, I learned that so far, my chemo symptoms have not been too bad at all. One woman wondered how I could even work through my treatments. I guess, by comparison, I have had it relatively easy.

I have one more round of my A and C chemo on Sept. 29th and then I begin weekly rounds of Taxol and Herceptin. The Herceptin is side-effect-free. Yay! The Taxol, from what the nurses have told me, shouldn't be too bad either. We'll just have to take it one day at a time and see how things go.

Not a whole lot to report, but just wanted all of my followers to know that just because you may not hear from me as often as before, it doesn't mean anything is wrong. Now that I'm in full swing at work and the boys are back in school and Beni is busy with work and football, life in the Manzella house is hectic. We are all doing well. Like my mom always says, "No news is good news."

Please Donate Today

One of my very best friends, Jennifer Archer, who has been researching online since the moment I breathed the word "cancer" has organized a team for me called "Friends for Francesca" for the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in Lombard, Illinois on Sunday, September 25th. I am flattered and honored that so far, Jennifer, my other besties, Megan and Sharon, two co-workers and friends, Esther and Melinda, and my brother-in-law, Sal, and neices, Anna and Rosanna are all going to be walking along side me. I've already looked at the calendar, and that weekend should be one of my "good" weekends, a whole week after a chemo treatment, so I plan to walk with my friends and family. If I can do this, so can you!

My friends, family and co-workers have all been so supportive and so I want them to be rewarded in this endeavor. We are walking and raising money to find a cure for this disgusting and life-threatening disease. The team's goal is $1,000. We are currently at $501. I signed up today and pledged the remaining $500. Beni also signed up and pledged $150. If you are local and chose to walk with us, you will donate $35.00 just by registering. If you live far away and would like to help, please make a donation. It doesn't have to be a big monetary sum. Every little bit counts! This is a great way for you far-away supporters to help!

Cut and paste this address and go to the site to join our team or make a donation:

http://chicagoland.info-komen.org/site/TR/Eventspx=10633289&pg=personal&fr_id=2251&s_subsrc=bfgetwordout&s_src=boundlessfundraising

Thanks in advance for your support! Lots of love to all of you!

God, I work in a great place

Today, I left my school building overcome with tears of emotion. I work in a school building that often gets a bad rep. It's in a low-income area, we have low test scores and gangs. So far this semester I have quickly fallen in love with the new students in my classes. They have been supportive and sweet in learning about and dealing with my cancer. I am blessed to work with such great kids.

This afternoon, as I was packing my things to go home, I noticed a girl in the hallway outside my room. She looked familiar, but I couldn't recall her name (not unusual from year to year, for me anyway). Finally, she came in and said, "I don't know if you remember me, but I was in your study hall last year. I heard that you have cancer. I'm a Christian and I was wondering if I could pray for you."

I told her I did remember her. I did, after all, recognize her, though I may not have remembered her name. I told her I welcome any prayers anyone wants to pray for me. She asked if I would mind if she prayed with me right then and there. I closed the classroom door and we stood to the side of my classroom, and this sweet, little Latina girl prayed the most heartfelt and emotion-filled prayer to God, asking to look over me and heal me. I was moved to tears and when she was finished I gave her a big hug and thanked her.

THAT is why I work at East Aurora High School. One kid in one study hall cared enough about me to come and say a prayer for me. At East High our students may not get the best grades or highest ACT scores, but, damn it, they have the biggest hearts in the world! I may not like decisions that are handed down to us from the central office and I may not agree with the Board of Education, but the kids who come through our doors are some of the best kids anyone one in the field of education could ask for. I LOVE my students!

Reality Sets In

Despite having a shaved head and wearing a wig, feeling icky and tired, I sometimes don't feel like a cancer patient. That all changed last night.

We spent the day at my sister-in-law's house for a Labor Day BBQ. It was a nice time with lots of friends and family and way too much food as always. We arrived around 2:30 and left at about 7:00. Luckily, we left the boys to spend the night at my mother-and-father-in-law's house because they had a teacher inservice day Tuesday and no school. My intention was to work a half day on Tuesday and then go to my first oncologist appt. at 12:30. My in-laws would drop off the boys after I came home.

Before we even left, I was feeling chilled and was sitting on the couch with a blanket over me, but I thought it was because after two near 100 days, the upper 60 temps were just a little tough to take. In the car, I started feeling more chilled like I had a fever. Getting out of the car, I started shivering and couldn't stop. I went straight upstairs and put on long pajamas and a robe and curled up on the couch with a blanket to type out lesson plans for my half day sub. Once that was done, I took a couple of Tylenol and just lay and watched The Kardashians until about 9:30 when I went up to bed. Having been too lazy to get the thermometer from upstairs sooner, I took my temperature. It was a whopping 103! There is a rule when you are undergoing chemo - if your temperature goes above 100.5, you have to call the doctor. So, I did.

While I waited for the answering service to deliver my message and for the doctor to return my call, I typed a full-day lesson plan knowing that if I had to go in to the ER, it would be a late night and if I was still running a temp, I wouldn't feel much like going in to work tomorrow. I sent that off, heard back from the doctor and Beni and I got dressed and were off to CDH ER at 10:30 p.m.

The nice thing about being a chemo patient is that there is relatively no wait in the ER. I was taken back in 5 minutes. The nurse asked how I was doing and I said that for the first time, I was really feeling like a cancer patient. I guess this temperature thing can be serious. He took us into an ER room and gave me a gown and told me to lay down and they would take care of me. I said, "Wow, do I really need to put this on?" He said, "I know you don't realize it yet, but the gravity of this is more than you know. Why do you think you got in so quickly while other people were out in the waiting room before you?" Good point. So, Beni slumped in the chair in the corner and pulled up his hood and tried to sleep. Over the course of the next 3 hours, in between cat naps, I gave a urine sample, several blood samples and a chest-x-ray. Everything came back good, so at 1:30 a.m. I was released. If a sign of infection had been found, I would have had to stay hooked up to IVs for a while. Luckily, the temperature was just a freak thing, and no IVs were needed.

So, from this experience I have learned several things.

1. I don't want to have to return to the ER for a temperature again, if possible.

2. I should be less lazy and check my temperature as soon as I feel one coming on - not just as I am getting into bed.

3. If you have to go to the ER, it is good to be a chemo patient.

Bald is Beautiful Week 1

Thanks for all the loving and positive responses to my last entry. I know I am more than just my hair but all of your reminders helped me get over the anxiety of having a shaved head. My first day at work wearing a wig went well. My students had been warned that it would happen sometime that week, so they were all supportive. I got lots of complements from both students and staff alike. On the second day, one former male student came up to me with another former female student and asked me, "Why do you look weird?" The girl said, "Why would you say that?" I told them both that I have cancer and that I was wearing a wig and that might be why I looked different. The girl was shocked and gave me a hug. Then I looked to the boy and said, "So, do you still think I look weird?" He said, "Yeah." Knowing him, I was unphased. It was typical of that kid. At least my weird is temporary. Don't know if I can say the same for him. : )

On the first day of wig-wearing, I had the strange experience of not having my hair move naturally with my head as I turned left and right to back out of my driveway. I was jonesing to get it off as soon as possible. Two hours before the end of the school day, I started counting the minutes. Each day has gotten easier. At home, I wear cotton hats so as not to scare any neighborhood kids who come to the back door. I sleep bald, which was also a little hard to get used to. My bristly head against the pillow was a strange sensation.

I had my second chemo treatment on Thursday and was in the chair from 1:30 until 6:15. Crazy long time, but it was fine. The nurses are all really nice and the chair is comfy. I had time to grade one class's writing samples, read some prayer cards that people have sent or given me, and then watch a little news and HGTV. My only complaint was that my neighbors were a little louder than I would have liked. Why do people scream into cell phones? I was able to drive myself to and from.

Yesterday, the boys and I went in for my Neulasta shot which is a quick 15 minutes ordeal. Weight, blood pressure, temperature and oxygen check and then a shot. After that we picked up California Pizza Kitchen on the way home for my Friday night date with my girlfriends and went home to meet them. My friends and I enjoyed dinner and conversation and the boys got to play with their friends and everyone was happy.

Today I felt okay until I started taking sheets off the beds and felt achy in my shoulders and back. I took some trusty Tylenol and feel much better. Gonna take it easy now and grade some more papers and prepare for the week at work. I am hoping to be back to work on Tuesday for a half day before my next oncologist appt. at 12:30. We'll see how that goes. I'll fill you in again then.