It's Sarah, Miss Palin If You're Nasty.

Let me just begin by saying that I have not yet had the opportunity to watch the Tina Fey spoofs of Sarah Palin on SNL but have heard they are awesome.

That being said, I have always thought there was something "off" about her. On my first introduction to her on the evening of McCain's announcement of having chosen her as a running mate, I thought, "Hhmm. She's cute, but definitely doesn't look like VP material." Upon hearing that her daughter was pregnant soon thereafter, I thought to myself, "Hhmm. Maybe that's it. Is she so busy with her career that she doesn't know what's going on at home? Or maybe she condones 'free love'. Hell, she has 5 kids with hippie names like Willow."

One day recently, I was able to put my finger on exactly what it is about ol' Sarah
that I question. She's a naughty girl. When I look at her I harken back to videos of the 80's. (I'm an 80's girl, after all) I see the librarian in Adam Ant's "Goody Two-Shoes" video, the female scientist in Thomas Dolby's "She Blinded Me With Science" or Tawny Kittain (?) in the Whitesnake video, writhing all over the hood of a rock star's car. Think about it. Can't you just see her, seductively pulling off those glasses and unpinning that up-tight bun and shaking out that flowing hair? Her politician look is just a disguise. Deep down, she's a dirty girl.

Although my description may sound like I'm hot for her, I'm not, though my husband might be. Now, dirty girls have their place. Who else would star in the rock and rap videos? Who would keep the porn industry going? Who would tend to all those drunk 20 and 30-something men in trendy bars looking for one night stands? The lyrics of an Usher song say, "We want a lady in the street, but a freak in the bed." Dirty girls try to look like ladies, but we can see right through them. We know that they're freaks because they have that certain something that screams, "Deep down, I'm naughty."

Regardless, her ranking on People Magazine's 100 Hottest People does not a vice-president or potential president make. McCain may have chosen her to pick up all the lost Hilary supporters, or he may have chosen her because she's the kind of girl the Republican men like to cheat on their wives with, but I cannot give my vote to a dirty girl.